A new school year is approaching, and with it comes contemplation of how in the world I'm going to tackle the next several months. I have a lot of juggling ahead of me: three children in school (including a dramatic and emotional almost-teenager who would be involved in every activity imaginable if we let her), blogging, new photography business, and starting my master's degree program. Which then leads me to wonder what exactly is wrong with me. Clearly I am insane to take on all of that, willingly. And yet, I am taking it on. And I know I will make it work somehow. I will pull it off by using one very simple, and yet very significant, approach.
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This week I did something that scared the crap out of me. The kind of thing that has you awake in the middle of the night and hyperventilating into a paper bag. Before I tell you what it was, let me explain something about myself. I have always been "a good girl". I have always done what was expected of me. I have always tried to be the best version of myself in all my roles. Daughter. Mom. Wife. Friend. Employee. This often means not calling a lot of attention to myself. It means putting my needs aside so I can take care of someone else. It means putting my wants on a shelf because someone else's wants were more important. It means ignoring parts of myself because I am focusing my attention on being something for someone else, rather than simply being myself. Over time, I realized I was fading into the background of my own life. I know I'm not alone in this. I'm betting you have felt this same way. But what happens when that isn't enough for you anymore?
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