You ever have one of those moments as a parent when you think "I did such a good job. I really took care of ______."? I had one of those moments the other day. Logan's winter coat was looking a little small, and so my husband and I took advantage of Cyber Monday sales and ordered him a new one. In bright orange, which is great because he can take off on the playground like lightening, and sometimes it's hard for his aide to figure out where he went. A bright orange coat would make him much easier to spot. I was feeling so proud of being on-the-ball that I mentioned it to his aide at school the next day, and commented on how much better his new coat would be. Unfortunately, I also learned that his snow pants were getting a bit small, and too bad I didn't know about that when I was ordering his coat, but oh well. I continued feeling great until I was putting away some fall coats, and noticed something hanging way in the back of the closet. It looked like a winter coat, and upon closer reflection, appeared like it might fit Logan. On an impulse I had him try it on. Fit perfectly. It was about then I realized that this was the coat he wore all last winter. And that led me to wonder about the coat he'd been wearing for the past several weeks.
As embarrassing as it was to realize that we'd been squeezing him into a size 3T coat (he's 6 years old, for heaven's sake), and as annoyed as I was that we'd ordered a coat he didn't need, and didn't order the snow pants he does need, it was also a good reminder for me. I am not perfect. And no one expects me to be. As I shared this story with people (because in spite of feeling like an idiot, even I could admit it was pretty funny), it quickly became clear that everybody else could totally understand. They'd all been there. They'd all had moments when they did something ridiculous. And they understood it didn't make them incompetent. It made them human. As parents we tend to feel like we have to do it perfectly. If we don't, we will be failing our children in some huge way. They will suffer because we messed up. Of course, in reality this is completely and utterly wrong. Ironically, not letting them see that everyone makes mistakes, and it's okay, is failing them. We don't want our children to be afraid to make mistakes, so we need to show them that mistakes are normal. Beyond that, have you ever hung out with someone who was perfect? Don't you kind of hate them? No one wants to be around someone who's perfect. Why? Because as soon as you reach perfection, you lose something much more important...your humanity. So give it up. Give up your search for perfection. Give up unreasonably high expectations. Do your best, every day, but accept that your best will not be perfect. And that is exactly as it should be.
I am so glad you are here! Welcome to my blog. This is your space, too. My name is Amy, and I am no stranger to the ups and downs of life. Join me as we search for beauty, authenticity, tell our truth, and hold space for each other in the messiness of life.